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Saturday, October 17, 2009
i haven't said "i love you" to a boy in ages , it gives me shivers when i said it to him via txt .. wow , its weird , :L , but , those words i can't trust anymore :L , because they still belong to the catergory of , " just words " & " actions speak louder than words " , & i really don't know if I'M telling the truth, i dont trust myself with words , i'm talkative , words jst come out , sighh ,
xx Tuesday, October 13, 2009 i use to DIE for a bf , to find that guy i would like , :D , that guy in my dreams. now , i just want to have fun :L , though .. not caring , if i ever get a bf , or something , a date , someone asking me out , well thats fate , & it'll happen , if its suppose to happen , no point trying + your single, not dead. :) it doesnt matter :) , if i am single , then i am , if im taken then i am , whatever happens , well , then thats whats gonner happen . i am who i am , and i'll be who i will be , i can't change fate, neither can i change who i'll be. xx Sunday, October 11, 2009 Why am i running away , i remembered something really traumatising from the past , & realised , i totally forgot abt him . shit , :L , is it bad or good though ? did i do what i did to forget abt him , which worked but then .. is that being included the fact i was running away from him ? , but doesnt that make me a coward ? , wait .. not really i faced the situation heaps, thats why it was traumatising ! , but then , why am i running away from something . i have control to go back to it , but i choose not to ? , should i .. ? i dont know , BUT , im jst going to ignore and keep going with my life, i can't jst go back to the start, its not fair , through everything i've been through , & i think he knows me good enough , that i dont really want to like. .talk to him ? thats why he hasnt calld or anything . :) all i need to do , is keep moving forward , don't take a step back , side , anywhere except forward, whatever thats in my track :) , walk over it , :) i was watching a movie , & this girl .. shes in love, or something , i dont know, but like , you watch the movies , & you like them , cos they're realistic to you, like its true, not impossible, & like , you wish you could do that .. but then, i realised, you want to be in love , because you wish you could live those movie scenes in reality , im serious, people do , & thats how people get all these advice , they tell you to do this and that , or something , but i BET they got it off a movie , or themself, but like , movie scenes are really common , & they make it in the movie cos they KNOW its common, thats why its so predictable sometimes. xx Tuesday, October 6, 2009 sometimes .. you jst can't fight it after watching vampire diaries, i had the most chilly shivers down my spine, it feels SOOO MAD, :L so i decided to blog. They have such dramatic scenes that happen in ACTUAL reality, which makes me love this tv show, i mean, how often do you see a tv show that actually relates to reality, :L , I hate shows that are SO predictable, and like, FAKE. But the only thing about this show that can't be in reality, is the characteristics in characters, like, IN YOUR DREAMMS , you might have a guy that would be like that, its like a DREAMMM GUYY , == , a guy every girl dreams about. mann , but their scenes , theres lik so many at a time, one girl ignores everything cos she loves him so much, but not really , she ignores him cos hes persuading her with his eyes, cos his a vampire ? (didn't know they could do that) , well ,yeahhs , it reminds me when relationships , girls, they ignore everything bad about the guy,cos they love him so much, which is fuckinnnngg stupid , == , well anyways , but another girl , two guys liking her, but she only likes one. she does the things that WE should do in reality, but we don't ? i dont know, well I don't. what i would write is, they have such cute quotes its SOOO cute ! FARR , so obsessed, & its inspiring me to read twilight, but, i'm too embarrassed, because .. I'm a bit delayed ? :L i shall blog another day xx Monday, October 5, 2009 have you ever doubt someone, & now your like, wow .. i thought she was something else, or something. like, you've bitchd abt them so much , then when out of no where, your perspective's been changed, not knowing how, but it just did. have you ever talk to yourself, & then like, start making descisions to yourself, but then getting annoyed at yourself, LOL , i'm not retarted okay ! but like , you start talking and form a conversation to yourself when your bored. talked to yourself & solve your problems, LOLS , yes i do this, i thank myself as well, and like ask myself, & sometimes, when you hear your own question , it's easier to solve, for some reason ? maybe its like, your own sense ? :L regret but don't, keep other's problems stuck on you, sometimes, you regret something, & then think , wait, if that never happened i wouldn't have done this, so like, you don't know if its a regret or not, OR you say, its a regret, but not? :L if you know what i mean. or like, sometimes people say something to you, but they say its not your fault but then you think to yourself that, if I had never done THIS , then she/he would have NEVER done that, & put yourself to the blame, and your friends are just calling you an idiot, or its not your fault, but like, you can't just say that :L . just felt like saying it, so i can read the stuff i do thats very idiotic :L xx Saturday, October 3, 2009 i hate deciding, its like, everytime i decide something its the wrong one. So, I wouldn't pick the one i decide at first, but then if i pickd the other one afterwards , it's still deciding right? I can't evn trust myself on my descisions ? I'm so bloody dependent, == cos, i feel like I will always make the wrong descision , But, i hate it when people get dragged in it with me, I feel responsible and realllly guilty. *sigh , that guy .. would i ever getto meet him again? i hope so , :) xx |
HELENBBY♥ " Everything has a reason," cbox the sites. shirley naida sarah jayne kai(music) ♥ June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 June 2010 September 2010 October 2010 April 2011 June 2011 July 2011 June 2016 imeem . 1 song Playing ♥ worlds apart by The Veronicas Designer : Chili. x o x o |